A letter to My Personal Squishy

I found our pictures and videos on my old phone. We were smiling. We had no idea what was coming. You said you like my smile and i like it when you were here.

"You are always in my heart. No matter where you are," you wrote in a letter that I've read a million times.

I always think about you whenever i visit the place we went to. The pain is here. But it brings warmth a little bit.

"Everything has the first time," a line that i will always remember. You have my so many "first time". You are the first person that made me realised, i should be brave and i shouldn't regret anything that has happened.

You are also the first person that made me comfortable being myself around someone that i care about. 

"Don't think too much. I don't care. I like you being yourself." right? How i miss those lines come out from your beautiful lips.

I know you couldn't stay. I also know that you will always own my heart. No matter where you are. I will always have space for you.

I wish someday you will read this letter and realised how much you matter to me. Even when i fall for someone new, i would be a better person because of you.

As i told you before, if our path will never cross again, i am already happy to know that you are alive among these 7 billion people in this world. I am grateful to know that you are fine and healthy. 

You already know that you are my forever crush, right? 

With so much love,

Flori

September 15th, 2019